Since I happen to have done reasonably well in business, I receive semi-regular pitches from companies seeking my interest in the potential of investing in them.
I got one the other day that I loved, but for the wrong reasons.
I loved it because it looks like its author found a generic ‘please invest in me’ form letter somewhere, filled in the blanks, and just fired it off to lots of people he’d read about somewhere on the Internet, expecting money to fall out of the sky in response.
I’ve turned it back into a generic form letter by simply putting generic field names back into it.
Good morning [FIRSTNAME],
[AAA] Capital Pty Ltd is pleased to introduce [BBB] Pty Ltd, the company that has developed market transformational [CCC] technology. The company plans to launch its first mass commercial products.
[BBB]’s proprietary [CCC] technology will revolutionise [INDUSTRY-NAME], providing users [SOME-NIFTY-OUTCOME] that make the user feel and think they are [BETTER, FASTER, SMARTER, AND/OR MORE LIKELY TO GET LAID].
We have taken the liberty of attaching an executive summary, which also has links to two private YouTube videos, one short and one long detailed presentation.
We understand you are extremely busy, but we believe a quick review of the introduction and viewing the short private YouTube video will give you an insight into a major new market segment and the company that will become the global leader in this segment.
Thanks in advance and we welcome any feedback or requests for further information.
[LAZY PERSON HOPING FOR EASY MONEY]
I have to say – if you want to get the genuine attention of an Angel investor, you need to work a bit harder than this.
Using a form letter to seek serious investment is a pretty woeful form of time-wasting for all concerned.
Why would anyone seriously consider investing in your company, if this is the best that you can do?